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Friday, July 15, 2011
Monday, October 4, 2010
IF
If you could see inside of me
The beautiful mess I happen to be
If you could feel the pain wrapped up tight
Bottled up it serves me right
If you could hear the rhythm that my heart sings to
Makes the smile that could break a heart in two
If you could smell the fear that my eyes hide
In the dark holds them open wide
If you could taste my disaster
Passion with a hint of laughter
If I was lonely
If only
<3 ASH
The beautiful mess I happen to be
If you could feel the pain wrapped up tight
Bottled up it serves me right
If you could hear the rhythm that my heart sings to
Makes the smile that could break a heart in two
If you could smell the fear that my eyes hide
In the dark holds them open wide
If you could taste my disaster
Passion with a hint of laughter
If I was lonely
If only
<3 ASH
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Might As Well Raise Hell Before It Freezes Over
The title has nothing to do with my post, but I'm in Alaska and it sounded clever. It cracked me up at least. Anyway, This week has started out very stressful, but today it all seems to be coming together. My vehicle should be here tomorrow, I hope, it was last tracked in Anchorage which is only a few hours away. Even though We ran out of money a few days ago (because I had paid for my own tickets last pay check) We got a Military Star card today and we get paid tomorrow...finally! I set up our cable, internet, and phone today as well. I'm just really excited about the next couple of days!
Tomorrow I will do major shopping. Groceries, and things for the house to get organized and for decorating. Thursday our furniture arrives and our DVR and internet will be installed. This will be the first time we have had cable where we lived lol. Even though it's supposed to be a four day weekend Jon will probably only get one so whenever that is we are going to try this really amazing Italian restaurant... Even if we do have to take the kids lol. Getting the house together and feeling like a home while Jon is working really hard.
The big dilemma is now whether or not to get a a forty plus inch flat screen television for the living room (even though we have a 22 inch flat screen) or get a living room set. They are both the same price. I know we've already picked out the sofa set but I'm not sure anymore lol. Even though I picked up the wrong shower curtain rods and almost pulled my hair out with my son being oddly bad, I shouldn't be as stressed as I feel. Hoping we get pregnant soon. I know I've been random, but it's been a little hectic. Au Revoir.
Tomorrow I will do major shopping. Groceries, and things for the house to get organized and for decorating. Thursday our furniture arrives and our DVR and internet will be installed. This will be the first time we have had cable where we lived lol. Even though it's supposed to be a four day weekend Jon will probably only get one so whenever that is we are going to try this really amazing Italian restaurant... Even if we do have to take the kids lol. Getting the house together and feeling like a home while Jon is working really hard.
The big dilemma is now whether or not to get a a forty plus inch flat screen television for the living room (even though we have a 22 inch flat screen) or get a living room set. They are both the same price. I know we've already picked out the sofa set but I'm not sure anymore lol. Even though I picked up the wrong shower curtain rods and almost pulled my hair out with my son being oddly bad, I shouldn't be as stressed as I feel. Hoping we get pregnant soon. I know I've been random, but it's been a little hectic. Au Revoir.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
If You Want Something Done Right You Have To Do It Yourself
On August 14, 2010 I got on a flight with my two small children by myself from Atlanta, Georgia to Fairbanks, Alaska. Two very long layovers in Denver and Seattle I arrived at my final destination. If it had not been for my own free will and one amazing friend that already lived at Fort Wainwright, AK I would still be at home in Georgia and my husband would have been gone. I paid out of pocket for our tickets worried that I would not get to see my husband before he left. The Day before I had left Fort Eustis, VA had said that they had signed off on our command sponsorship so I thought all was at an end. I was wrong.
Later that week I had called Fort wainwright's office to see if they had received my papers and they told me no. I called back to Fort Eustis and they told me that they were not going to send the papers that since I was there I could give it to them myself. It doesn't work that way. My husband had to apply for it all over again through his unit. If I had waited on Fort Eustis to do their job and get the orders amended we probably would have been in GA for months. If I had not come up His unit would not have given him the choice to stay behind and be with us. Everything happens for a reason. Our Command Sponsorship should be done by the end of next month, but the only reason I need it now is to ship my House Hold Goods. I move into my house TOMORROW! Which ironically is two houses down from where I'm staying with our friends. It's the nicest ones I've seen for three bedrooms! Our car just left Seattle so it should be up here next week or two.
I'm so incredibly blessed! It is so beautiful here and I get to live with my soldier again!No matter how hard things seem to be at the time, it's always worth it in the end. Even if you have to do it yourself.
Later that week I had called Fort wainwright's office to see if they had received my papers and they told me no. I called back to Fort Eustis and they told me that they were not going to send the papers that since I was there I could give it to them myself. It doesn't work that way. My husband had to apply for it all over again through his unit. If I had waited on Fort Eustis to do their job and get the orders amended we probably would have been in GA for months. If I had not come up His unit would not have given him the choice to stay behind and be with us. Everything happens for a reason. Our Command Sponsorship should be done by the end of next month, but the only reason I need it now is to ship my House Hold Goods. I move into my house TOMORROW! Which ironically is two houses down from where I'm staying with our friends. It's the nicest ones I've seen for three bedrooms! Our car just left Seattle so it should be up here next week or two.
I'm so incredibly blessed! It is so beautiful here and I get to live with my soldier again!No matter how hard things seem to be at the time, it's always worth it in the end. Even if you have to do it yourself.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
The first cut is the deepest
My soldier is currently on a plane to Fort Wainwright, Alaska. Saying goodbye is really hard no matter how many times you have to do it. I will never get used to the feeling of my heart breaking when we have to be apart. Any day, his orders will be amended and they will give me and the kids our plane tickets... It's just a matter of time. I'm torn about not being able to go with him. On the one hand I don't get to experience the adventure and the first days at our new home together. On the other I get a little more time with my family and friends.
In the meantime, while I'm stuck in Georgia because Fort Eustis' lack of efficiency and ethic and he is in Alaska, I plan to be positive and very productive. Keep your fingers crossed that all of this gets finished at least this week or the next. It's all up to them, unfortunately, I've done all I could do. Be persistent and corteous if you find yourself in my position. I miss him already. I can't wait to be up there with him to start this exciting adventure together. Army wife strong.
In the meantime, while I'm stuck in Georgia because Fort Eustis' lack of efficiency and ethic and he is in Alaska, I plan to be positive and very productive. Keep your fingers crossed that all of this gets finished at least this week or the next. It's all up to them, unfortunately, I've done all I could do. Be persistent and corteous if you find yourself in my position. I miss him already. I can't wait to be up there with him to start this exciting adventure together. Army wife strong.
Monday, July 19, 2010
Things Fall Apart
In two days my husband, PV2 Cooper, will be graduating AIT at Fort Eustis, VA. I've been waiting for this day since he left the very first time on January 3rd of this year and it has finally arrived. Twenty nine weeks of not living, seeing, breathing my husband. I thought it would never end. I would finally get to live with him again and have my other half apart of me. Getting assigned Alaska has probably been the most hardest thing I have had to endure being an Army wife. Today I finally fell apart.
Last week I was diagnosed with High-risk HPV that could be giving me cancer. At first I was scared and upset, but my husband and my babies gave me so much strength and inspiration I'm ready for whatever happens. It was today when the EFMP (Equal Family Medical Program) manager told Jon the bad news that crushed me. My civillian Doctor had forgot to inform me that he had referred my daughter to an orthopedic specialist for her boed-legs and requested Aron to be re-screened. Without my daughter seeing the specialist and my son to be screened again, and the paperwork getting processed in time, I will not be allowed to leave for Alaska with my husband. I was devestated.
Going through all of these hardships for all these months without the very man who completed me was about to pay off. Being left behind feels unfair to me. All because a civillian doctor didn't do his job correctly. After breaking into pieces and seeing how hard my husband was trying to fix everything when he was hundreds of miles away,gave me the fuel I needed to step up. I was assertive and luckily I am getting my son seen tomorrow and my daughter to atlanta the next day. After Aeva gets finished we are leaving straight from there to Virginia. I can only do what I have control over and have faith in things that I do not. I'm going to take my soldier home after graduation and enjoy every second of it. If i'm not in Alaska with him on August 3rd I will be up there soon. Never give up. We're Army Strong
Last week I was diagnosed with High-risk HPV that could be giving me cancer. At first I was scared and upset, but my husband and my babies gave me so much strength and inspiration I'm ready for whatever happens. It was today when the EFMP (Equal Family Medical Program) manager told Jon the bad news that crushed me. My civillian Doctor had forgot to inform me that he had referred my daughter to an orthopedic specialist for her boed-legs and requested Aron to be re-screened. Without my daughter seeing the specialist and my son to be screened again, and the paperwork getting processed in time, I will not be allowed to leave for Alaska with my husband. I was devestated.
Going through all of these hardships for all these months without the very man who completed me was about to pay off. Being left behind feels unfair to me. All because a civillian doctor didn't do his job correctly. After breaking into pieces and seeing how hard my husband was trying to fix everything when he was hundreds of miles away,gave me the fuel I needed to step up. I was assertive and luckily I am getting my son seen tomorrow and my daughter to atlanta the next day. After Aeva gets finished we are leaving straight from there to Virginia. I can only do what I have control over and have faith in things that I do not. I'm going to take my soldier home after graduation and enjoy every second of it. If i'm not in Alaska with him on August 3rd I will be up there soon. Never give up. We're Army Strong
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Christmas in July (Recieved Orders!)
After twenty two weeks of my husband being in training we had finally recieved orders. Recieving the information of your First Duty Station is like opening a christmas present when your five. You have waited so long in elongated suspense, maybe cried a little for not recieving them yet, that you are just glad to have it. My husband told me that it was Fort Wainwright, Alaska (Which is in Fairbanks). At first I was in complete shock. Korea and Alaska were the top two places I did not want to go. I was on a complete emotional roller coaster a few days afterwards. So many people telling me what I would have to do to go with him. I was frustrated that I had to go through a long drawn out process to even be able to go with my soldier.
Two weeks later, here I am feeling like the luckiest woman in the world. Alaska is going to be the greatest adventure of my life so far. I plan to enjoy every minute of being with my husband and my two babies. I can't wait to explore such a beautiful place. It feels like christmas in July. Long winters just mean more quality time close with my soldier <3.
Two weeks later, here I am feeling like the luckiest woman in the world. Alaska is going to be the greatest adventure of my life so far. I plan to enjoy every minute of being with my husband and my two babies. I can't wait to explore such a beautiful place. It feels like christmas in July. Long winters just mean more quality time close with my soldier <3.
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